This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
