Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to sanitize my soul.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?