I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
