wat bout pragnant strippers??
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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