I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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