I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
