it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
These tits shall not be calmed
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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