I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
