East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
