Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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