just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
