Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
false alarm, still single
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
