Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
