i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
