he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize