State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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