Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
