I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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