Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
