I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
