we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
