I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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