Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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