Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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