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I'm eating all of the evidence.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
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