Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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