To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
