I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Randomize