butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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