Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
