I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
