weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
