Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
