time to smoke my breakfast
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
