Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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