I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
