my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I don't think brook has ever known best
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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