if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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