Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
