So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize