i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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