Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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