do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
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mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
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yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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