One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
