i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I can't turn off my feet"
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
