I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
