I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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