We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize
