Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Floor bacon is actually really good
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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