U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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