I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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